When you meet your college friends, you talk nonsense about how you just had an interview at this company and are waiting for the interview results at that company. That A., who you studied with in college, is now very rich and has opened a law firm with annual income of tens of billions. That B. is just as good and his own company is also famous in the market. That this person works for this corporation, that one just got married to a rich man, that one just bought a house, and you conclude that everyone in your class is good.
Hearing this, I felt a pang of sadness when I looked back at my income and my problems. I was in the same class as those guys, but why were they at the top while I was still lagging behind? Was I choosing a strange path in life?
While I was thinking, my phone rang with a text message, it was another friend from college, he said his father had just passed away, he was feeling very bad because he hadn't spent enough time with his family lately, now he didn't have time anymore. Suddenly I remembered the day before when I passed by a hospital, I saw a friend taking his child to see a doctor, he was wearing a suit, his face was flustered, he must have just met a client or gone to court. When I asked where his wife was, he said she was busy with a project so he was the only one busy taking care of everything for the children.
I asked how you knew about everyone’s situation. “It’s all on social media, people show off everything now” – you replied immediately. Ah, so it’s all there, where everyone competes to show off how happy they are.
"Surfing" around social networks, I saw Ms. A checking in to work in a fancy cafe, next to an expensive designer bag, Ms. B. complaining about traffic jams while driving her newly bought luxury car to work, Mr. C. posting a photo of himself working on a 5-star resort beach, Ms. D. busy running a project for the multinational company she works for, E.'s younger sister showing off her newly taken bikini photos, her youthful and vibrant body, everyone is busy and has this, has that... and surely many people who see the above content will look back and compare themselves with themselves and feel inferior, then think of ways to have photos like that to post on their social networks. So the race begins, escalating every day because the more you compete, the more you have to prove your happiness through wealth, possessions, and busyness.
But how many people know the truth behind that competition? Ms. A. is in credit card debt and cannot pay it off with her current income. Ms. B. borrowed from the bank to buy a luxury car. Mr. C. reposted old travel photos from 3 years ago. Ms. D. is being bullied by her boss into doing a lot of work. The younger sister who showed off her bikini photos had asked a photoshop artist to create those glamorous photos.
No one knows these things, they only see the surface of the problem and think happiness is that easy, then compare themselves, blame themselves for being bad, others feel pressured and try to find ways to "rise up" to be like people on social networks and forget about their real life. This is a new type of pressure that is born next to the "traditional" pressures in life.
One time, a friend asked her husband to come home early to pick up the kids and then hurriedly said goodbye to me so she could make it to an afternoon tea date with a group of "posh" friends. "It's been a long time since I posted a picture, that place is really beautiful" - she said before leaving. A few minutes later, I saw her post a picture of the tea and cakes and said that the cakes here were delicious. I texted her to ask if the tea and cakes were really delicious, she replied "boring, all sugar". I was a bit disappointed, but it helped me understand that in this day and age, I have to consider even pressure before adding it to my list of pressures, otherwise I will accidentally participate in "happiness contests" on social networks.
Article: Ngo Tu Ngan
Illustration: TL
