The seventh lunar month marks the season of gratitude, a beautiful tradition for most Buddhists. It's a time of joyful reflection, awakening children's longing for their parents' well-being through vegetarianism. It's also a time when children wear vibrant red roses while their parents are still alive, and white flowers in remembrance of those who have passed on to the realm of ultimate bliss.
Early in the morning, I overheard my colleagues chatting about vegetarian restaurants and how their mothers used to make familiar vegetable dishes. One suggested going to the temple after work to pray and offer flowers. Pink flowers for both parents, yellow flowers for those still alive and those who have passed away, and white flowers for those who have lost both parents. The stories about parents started flowing again, bringing up old memories and reflecting on them. Some of them, already married with children, began to understand the worries, hardships, sacrifices, and frugality of raising children. After a while, the younger colleagues looked at each other and concluded: showing filial piety isn't just for one season.
Filial piety is not just about one season, one day, or one particular moment in the year or month. Parents give birth and raise their children until the day their children are old enough to understand, to spread their wings and venture out into the world to make a living, to see and think; to know the value of precious stones and moss; to know the relentless, cruel passage of time. At that very moment, time has turned their hair gray, etched with the marks of time and wind. Time leaves its mark on their faces. Only when the season of gratitude arrives do we feel a pang in our hearts. Only then do we look at each other and realize how heavy the burden of filial piety truly is!
Young people's time may be spent on countless long journeys, but their parents' time is focused in only one direction: towards their children. Children eagerly anticipate countless fun times with friends, late nights home, adventurous trips, and cherished relationships. In reality, they often stubbornly refuse family gatherings; they get annoyed and irritable when their parents repeatedly ask them the same question; they return home late and drunk, unaware of their parents' sleepless nights of worry and anxiety…
Filial piety is just one word, yet its meaning is vast. For parents, sometimes joy, success, a comfortable and fulfilling life, or simply the safe return of their children after a hard day's work, is happiness. The happiness of the elderly is sometimes measured in days or hours, for no one knows when the leaves will wither and fall, sometimes just a gentle breeze can bring it. Therefore, complete filial piety isn't about fasting or waiting for special occasions; it's about everyday actions that let parents know their love for their children is reciprocated in a worthy way.
Occasionally, young people still express filial piety on social media through glamorous travel photos, luxurious restaurant meals, and expensive gifts for their parents. They enthusiastically believe this is the practical fulfillment of their filial duty. Filial piety suddenly garners hundreds of thousands of likes and countless shares. Sadly, the age of technology acts like a stimulating game, drawing young people into a pursuit of illusion and fame. Filial piety can sometimes be very simple! It might just be a simple meal with familiar dishes in the old house that warms the hearts of parents. It could be making a morning coffee for father, buying a shirt for mother, finding a morning newspaper for father, or finding a book for mother. Or it could be sitting on the porch listening to parents recount old stories of their lives and their children. Listening to their parents lament the hardships and poverty of their younger years. Then seeing their parents smile at their children's growth today. The elderly live on memories. Those memories, whether sad or happy, have become ingrained in their very being. Those are the memories we will cherish forever, until one day those white clouds drift away into the sky.
The seventh lunar month is a time for fasting and for wearing flowers on one's lapel, but there's no need to wait for the month of gratitude. Let's start by spending time with our parents, finding peace and serenity in their words and smiles—those are the most complete expressions of filial piety and gratitude.
Article by: Tong Phuoc Bao
Illustrative image: Archival material
