Master of body language comes to Vietnam.

A world-leading expert on body language recently arrived in Hanoi and was fascinated by observing people's expressions around Hoan Kiem Lake. He noticed that "women are always glancing around to try and guess what men are thinking, while men have a poker face that's very difficult to read."

Body language expert Allan Pease. Photo: peaseinternational.com

VnExpress had a conversation with Allan Pease about his journey into the field of body language reading and the challenges he faced in this profession.

- How did you get into the field of body language reading?

My career began in 1956. My father was a life insurance salesman, going door-to-door every night to collect cash. When I was little, he often took me with him, and I heard him talk about insurance almost every day, about 46 times a week. During that time, I realized that we can learn how people react from their body language, especially in negotiations with clients. I still remember my father teaching me: "If you want pocket money, you have to sell something."

In the following years, I worked in jobs such as selling household goods and financial products like life insurance and investment packages. This gave me a lot of experience in negotiation and judging partners' thoughts through their attitudes.

In 1969, I was invited to share my knowledge on selling household goods like pots and pans. One of the skills I shared was how to read the thoughts of the person opposite me, or my business partner. In 1971, I compiled my understanding of body language reading onto cassette tapes for the first time. Around this time, I also wrote two books: one on retail and another on understanding partners through their body language. This body language information was later adapted into a 1980 TV show dedicated to reading the body language of everyone from politicians and music stars to even criminals.

There's a famous show called "Lie to Me" around the world. In that show, the police show the criminal's body language, and I analyze that body language to see where they're lying and where they're telling the truth.

- Which case left the strongest impression on you?

- I still remember a case involving body language where I helped someone avoid years in prison. It was in Australia, a baby was eaten by hyenas, and the police claimed the baby's killer was its mother, Lindy Shambeglayn. The woman insisted she didn't kill the baby, that it was caught and eaten by hyenas. She was a friend of mine, and she came to me for help.

At the time, TV showed a scene where the mother said a hyena had taken her child. Viewers noticed her reaction: she wore sunglasses to conceal her face, and especially, her mouth was slightly upturned, giving the impression that she was smiling. This angered many other mothers in Australia. The jury, during the trial, also relied on this detail to sentence her to 15 years in prison, even though they found no evidence.

Around that time, Lindy called me for advice on how to get out of the case. I told her, "Don't lie to me, because I can read your mind." It might not be 100% true, but Lindy was terrified of what I could do, and she said, "No, I'm not the one who killed the baby." During the two-hour interview, I saw two possibilities: either she was lying but thought she was telling the truth (this is a psychological disorder), or she was telling the truth.

I realized she was telling the truth. So, during the three years she was imprisoned, I found evidence proving that her smiling facial expression reflected fear, and I helped her change her body language accordingly. She was eventually released after three years in prison. The court also awarded her $500,000 in compensation for wrongful imprisonment. Later, the police found the child's body and bone fragments indicating the child had been attacked by hyenas.

- On what basis do you assume that person is innocent?

I've noticed that people have two ways of laughing. The first is when the lower jaw slightly lowers, and the corners of the mouth pull slightly backward. This is the laugh of someone who is happy. This type of laugh is used to show that you are not threatening them, that you are harmless. The second type of laugh is when the corners of the mouth pull sideways or downwards instead of upwards. Most people usually can't distinguish between this type of laugh – the one when happy and the one when scared.

People thought the woman was laughing when she talked about the kidnapped child, but in reality, if you pay attention, you'll see it was the expression of a very frightened mother who couldn't control herself. I explained this on television.

This case illustrates the crucial role of body language. The woman went to jail simply because her body language was misinterpreted. Approximately 60-80% of the messages we convey are through body language. When body language is misinterpreted, it can lead to correspondingly incorrect reactions.

Scientifically, based on Darwinian theory, I have proven that there is always a consistency between what people express and what they think. Those who are able to recognize this can discern whether someone is lying or not. For example, their mouths might be lying, but their attitude and gestures might suggest something completely different. Based on this, I have been able to distinguish between those who are telling the truth and those who are lying.

- Your wife is also an expert in body language, so how do you deal with her in real life when she "sees through" your intentions?

- On my wife's 40th birthday, she said, "I just want a small, intimate party," but I knew she was lying. So, I decided to throw a surprise birthday party and planned a big one for her. I secretly called my friends, and in four nights I had everything ready.

One evening, I came home, and my wife asked, "What were you doing? Where did you go?" At that moment, some of my body language cues made her guess. I said, "Nothing," and she saw through me, but she pretended not to know. She asked, "Do you want to talk about that?" I replied, "No, there's nothing to talk about." Then I realized I had overreacted, as this was the first sign of lying. My wife said, "Whenever you want to talk, I'm ready to listen."

We went to bed and neither of us said anything that night, and I hoped my wife would forget about it. But the next morning, she came up to me and asked, "Are you going to explain what happened to me? Don't hide it from me anymore." Actually, my wife thought I was having an affair. I had to confess that I was going to throw her a surprise birthday party.

In fact, my wife reads my body language better than I read hers. She also has a very good ability to apply body language.

- Specifically, how did his wife "see through" him?

Last week, my wife and I attended a political party. Everyone was dressed formally and elegantly. As we sat down to eat, my wife could almost tell the state of other couples' marriages – it's the body language of love. You can observe and recognize that some couples are happy, while others are having problems.

In another instance, when my wife and I attended a negotiation together, we divided the tasks as follows: I would pay close attention to the contract details, while my wife would observe what everyone else was doing—in other words, I listened, and she watched. Afterwards, we discussed our counterpart. Sometimes it felt like we were attending two completely different meetings, because what our counterpart said and did didn't match.

For example, I might say it's a good price, while my wife says she's not so sure, and in almost every negotiation, the decision leans towards my wife because I just listen.

- Are you suggesting that women understand body language better than men?

Women are far better at recognizing liars than men. As soon as women have children, they learn to "read" their babies' nonverbal cues, such as whether the baby is hungry or wants to be picked up. Furthermore, historically, as the weaker sex, women have always had to assess whether approaching someone is dangerous or a friend, thus developing a greater ability to read body language than men. Most women demonstrate that they can lie without men realizing it.

- How do you see the nonverbal expression of emotions among men and women in my country?

- There are always differences in body language between men and women. In Vietnam, that difference is even greater. Men here express the same emotions—joy, sadness, anger—through their faces. I think Vietnamese men seem to be suppressing their emotions too much in public. I believe that if they want to be more popular, gentlemen should express their feelings more openly.

It seems that Vietnamese women have more easily recognizable expressions. When I went to Hoan Kiem Lake, I saw many couples where the woman was constantly glancing around, trying to guess what the man was thinking, while the men had expressionless faces, making it difficult to read their emotions.

- How can an ordinary person possess such "special" abilities as him?

- You can buy my book, or you can turn on the TV, mute it, then focus on the screen and try to figure out what they're trying to say. Or you can go to a restaurant and observe about 4-5 times to read about someone's marital status.

Actually, the study of body language has been around for a long time. In 1970, this phenomenon exploded, and I was simply the one who brought that research into practice; I didn't invent or create the concept myself. Currently, there are books that list over a million different body language expressions worldwide.

Many countries around the world make extensive use of body language knowledge. For example, in court proceedings, a clerk records what people say, another clerk describes their actions or expressions, and then compares the two recordings to understand the situation.

In fact, when we sit face-to-face and talk, we are all unconsciously reading each other's attitudes and thoughts, the only difference being whether we do it professionally or not.

What are the typical signs of someone who is lying?

- Here, I want to talk about deliberate lies intended to exploit others. I want to emphasize that you shouldn't judge someone based on just one signal; you need at least three signals to determine if they're telling the truth or lying. For example, someone touching their nose is the first signal, but don't jump to conclusions based on this action alone, because they might just have a cold.

But if, after rubbing their nose, they rub their eyes, pick their ears, and cross their arms while shaking their head even if they say yes, then it's clear they're lying.

In addition, language can also manifest in the nose when blood pressure is high. When lying, there will be more blood in the nose, or the nose will be more swollen than usual. Or, liars often stare into the distance.

According to VnExpress - TH