5 things parents should keep in mind so that their children never have the mindset of "waiting for the plums to fall into their mouths"
No parent wants their child to grow up to be lazy and lack effort in life. The following things will help you be "wise" when raising your child.
1. Give your children the right understanding of happiness in life
Happiness and enjoyment are not just about going to a water park or owning a new, expensive toy. Experts say that engaging in hedonistic activities can bring happiness, but they are not the key factor in raising children. If you prioritize this when raising children, they will become lazy and hedonistic.
However, parents need to know that there are ways to bring fun into their children's lives by letting them take care of plants, discover a new hobby like playing with a Rubik's cube, spend a day organizing a precious collection... even happiness is spending time with other people.
2. Let your child know that mistakes are a way to learn.
Parents need to understand that avoiding failure so that parents do not disappoint them will prevent children from taking on challenges that may lead to failure. You need to help your child see that effort and improvement are more important than perfection. Mistakes are not failures but opportunities for self-learning.
Children often think that their self-worth is determined by what they do. So your child may think that if he does poorly on a test, he will have less self-worth than his classmates or siblings. This is clearly not true, and you need to stop him from thinking this way.
3. Find your child's interests and strengths
Interests help children stay motivated. Without motivation, children will become discouraged and not try hard. Parents need to remember that children have their own interests and sometimes those interests are not the same as their parents. However, parents need to respect their children's interests and be open with them. Finding their strengths and interests will help parents find ways for their children to develop their passions and abilities.
4. Laziness is not unchangeable
Dr. Barish and Alyson Schater, psychologists and parenting experts, assert that laziness is not a personality trait. That is, laziness is not inborn or unchangeable. Experts say that laziness is a result. For example, laziness can stem from a lack of motivation, a child does not know his own goals. In this case, parents need to find the motivation to motivate their child.
In addition, experts say that children may be trying to avoid being judged as incapable or not knowledgeable or intelligent enough. If children try, they will know their shortcomings and lack of confidence. If they do not try, they will blame their lack of ability.
5. Encourage and motivate your child
Children always want to be encouraged, approved and want their parents to be proud of them. Children say they don't care about this but in fact they do. Parents' encouragement and confidence in their children's success is something that many parents do not pay attention to. Parents' encouragement and support is a way to create motivation for children to try. When this is lacking, your child feels that there is no one to share with and loses all motivation.