7 skills to teach your daughter before she turns 13

Puberty is a time when girls develop strong gender stereotypes. Parents need to know 7 skills to teach girls before the age of 13.

Here are seven skills you might consider teaching your daughter before she turns 13.

1. Respect and express your feelings

Typical girls are emotional and are usually very good at expressing them, as a result when they get overwhelmed by their emotions they often lose their minds.

So often we assume that girls and emotions go hand in hand, for better or worse, and we neglect to teach our girls about emotional intelligence, which Simmons says is the ability to express all shades of emotion.

Parents should teach their daughters to express their strongest emotions and attitudes. They can do this by forming their own emotions with the development of vocabulary such as sad, happy, worried, scared, angry, etc.

And when daughters express their true feelings, parents should encourage them rather than deny or challenge them.

2. Learn to be tolerant of yourself

It's easy to be the harshest critic, they say. But girls are naturally driven to please those around them. So when they fail, they often feel like they've let everyone down.

Research has shown that adolescent girls are more prone to feeling pessimistic when they fail, which leads to a higher likelihood of falling into depression.

To prevent this, according to Mr. Simmons, parents should teach their children how to face failure, teach their daughters how to be tolerant of themselves instead of blaming themselves. This way, their daughters can stand up after falling and love themselves more.

3. Learn to treat your body well

Nowadays, a series of reality TV shows are overshadowing the ability to individualize, which can make girls not know how to put themselves above their desires.

One way for girls to develop a positive, holistic relationship with their bodies is through sports. Physical activity helps them understand their bodies better and has a direct impact on a girl’s self-awareness and confidence.

But even a girl who is confident about her body often feels ashamed about her body and sexuality.

Mr. Simmons advises parents to talk to their daughters about their bodies from a young age. They should explain to their children about respecting their own bodies and emphasizing that it belongs to them.

According to Mr. Simmons, “when a girl feels uncomfortable about her body, she often doesn't express her true feelings and is more concerned with what other people want.”

4. Learn from friendship

Girls often put too much emphasis on friendships and focus too much on them. But we should not underestimate girls’ friendships. They teach girls how to assert themselves, compromise, and set boundaries.

Parents should view friendships as examples of healthy relationships and how they connect with others. Encourage girls to communicate honestly and develop themselves, and teach them the skills they will need as adults, Simmons advises.

5. Learn how to deal with abuse

No parent wants to hear about child abuse. Dealing with it is challenging because it involves many factors: communication, friendships, and the emotional resilience of parents. Digital abuse makes it even more complicated.

According to Simmons, a girl is abused when she doesn’t know how to deal with her own emotions. And once abused, girls often feel helpless and have difficulty standing up for themselves. In these cases, make sure they talk and seek help from adults. Teach girls to stay away from bad and inhumane things.

Many parents unintentionally encourage abusive behavior and intervene when their daughters are having trouble. But Simmons says they should teach their children to judge for themselves whether a relationship is good or not.

6. Learn to respect your gender identity

Julie Mencher, a psychologist and expert on gender and LGBT issues, says girls learn about gender identity from a young age. The problem is that gender is not just about being male or female.

Mencher recommends that parents use language to teach their children about sex and sexuality, focusing on developing their gender identity, not just being male or female. Being open in language and relationships will help girls feel more confident about their gender, whatever that may be.

7. Develop leadership qualities

There are plenty of examples of powerful female leaders like Hillary Clinton, Serena Williams, and Time magazine’s Woman of the Year Angela Merkel. But girls often struggle to develop their leadership qualities because they still find it difficult to express their true feelings, love themselves, or defend themselves against abusive behavior.

However, parents should take steps to develop their daughters’ leadership skills. Fathers can participate in household chores, such as raising children, while mothers can set an example by taking on certain leadership roles at work or in social activities.

According to Mr. Simmons, sports are also a way to develop a girl's leadership qualities.

These skills may not be easy to master, but a girl who is taught and practiced these skills by a trusted adult will have a better chance of becoming confident and competent enough to enter puberty.

According to Gia dinh.net