7 essential skills to teach your daughter before age 13
Adolescence is a time when girls develop rapidly amidst gender stereotypes. Parents need to be aware of 7 essential skills to teach their daughters before the age of 13.
Here are seven skills you might consider teaching your daughter before she turns 13.
1. Respect and express your feelings.
Typical girls always have their own emotions and are usually very good at expressing them; consequently, when they are overwhelmed by emotions, they often lose all reason.
Therefore, we often assume that girls and emotions always go hand in hand, good or bad, neglecting to teach girls about emotional intelligence. According to Simmons, this skill is the ability to express all shades of emotion.
Parents should teach their daughters to express their strongest attitudes and emotions. They can do this by forming their own emotions through developing vocabulary such as sadness, joy, anxiety, fear, anger, etc.
And when daughters express their true feelings, parents should encourage them, not deny or challenge them.
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2. Learn to be tolerant of yourself.
It's said that it's easy to be the harshest critic. But girls often want to please everyone around them. So when they fail, they often feel like they've let everyone down.
Research has shown that adolescent girls are often more prone to feelings of pessimism when they experience failure, which can lead to a higher likelihood of developing depression.
To prevent this, according to Simmons, parents should teach them how to cope with failure, teaching their daughters how to be forgiving of themselves instead of dwelling on self-blame. In this way, daughters can pick themselves up after setbacks and love themselves more.
3. Learn to treat your body well.
Currently, a plethora of reality TV shows are blurring the lines between the ability to individualize, which can leave girls unsure of how to prioritize themselves above their desires.
One way for girls to develop a positive and holistic relationship with their bodies is through sports. Physical activity helps them understand their bodies better and directly impacts a girl's self-awareness and confidence.
But even a girl who is always confident about her body can still often feel ashamed about her body and sexuality.
Mr. Simmons advises parents to talk to their daughters about their bodies from a young age. They should explain to their daughters the importance of respecting their own bodies and emphasize that it is something unique to them.
According to Simmons, "when a girl feels uncomfortable about her body, she often doesn't express her true feelings and is more concerned with what others want."
4. Learn from friendship.
Girls often prioritize friendships and focus too much on these relationships. But we shouldn't underestimate the importance of friendships for girls. They teach girls how to assert themselves, find fulfillment, and set boundaries for themselves.
Parents should view friendships as evidence of healthy relationships and how they connect with those around them. Encouraging daughters to socialize honestly and develop themselves, and teaching them the skills they need as adults, are things Mr. Simmons advises parents to do.
5. Learn how to handle abuse.
No parent wants to hear that their child has been abused. Addressing this is a challenge because it involves many factors: communication, friendship, and the emotional resilience of the parents. The current prevalence of digital abuse is making education on this issue even more complicated.
According to Simmons, a girl is abused when she doesn't know how to process her own emotions. And once abused, girls often feel helpless and find it difficult to stand up. In these cases, it's crucial that they talk to and seek help from adults. Girls need to be taught to stay away from evil and inhumane things.
Many parents unintentionally encourage abusive behavior and interfere when their daughters are struggling. But according to Simmons, they should teach their daughters how to assess whether a relationship is healthy or not.
6. Learn to respect your gender identity.
Julie Mencher, a psychologist and expert on gender and LGBT issues, argues that girls learn about gender identity from a young age. The issue here is that gender is not simply a matter of male or female.
Ms. Mencher advises parents to use language to teach their children about gender and sexuality, focusing on developing their gender identity rather than simply identifying as male or female. Openness in language and relationships will help girls feel more confident about their gender, whatever it may be.
7. Developing leadership qualities
There are many examples of powerful female leaders such as Hillary Clinton, Serena Williams, or Time magazine's Woman of the Year, Angela Merkel. However, women still struggle to develop their leadership qualities, finding it difficult to express genuine emotions, love themselves, or protect themselves from abuse.
However, parents should have methods to develop their daughters' leadership skills. Fathers can participate in household chores, such as raising children, while mothers can set an example by taking on certain leadership roles at work or in social activities.
According to Simmons, sports are also a way to develop a girl's leadership qualities.
These skills may not be easy to master, but a girl who is taught and practices them by a trusted adult will have a much better chance of becoming confident and ready to enter puberty.
According to Gia Dinh.net
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