Society

Family happiness is love and understanding

Minh Quan DNUM_CIZAGZCACE 09:15

On the occasion of Vietnamese Family Day (June 28), Nghe An Newspaper had a conversation with Meritorious Artist Nguyen Thi Le - Head of the Vi and Giam Folk Song Club of Minh Chau Commune (Dien Chau) about preserving family happiness.

PV:Dear Meritorious Artist Nguyen Thi Le, it is known that you and your husband, Mr. Le Xuan Hien, have been together for more than 40 years, experiencing so much sadness, joy, happiness, and suffering... So can you share a little about the journey you and your husband have been together up to now?

Meritorious Artisan Nguyen Thi Le:My husband and I are both from Van Tap village, Dien Binh commune, now Minh Chau commune, Dien Chau district. Our houses are only a few dozen meters apart, so we have known each other since we were two children. Growing up, we participated in local mass activities and movements together, and then fell in love with each other. After nearly 7 years of being in love, in 1979, Hien and I officially became a family. At that time, Hien was working in the Education sector, and I was a mass cadre in the commune.

After 2 months of marriage, Hien was assigned by the Education Department to reinforce the Central Highlands provinces, and I returned to work as a book distributor at the Dien Chau district bookstore. 3 years later, when my husband completed his mission and returned, I was able to enjoy the joy of motherhood. After having our first son in 1982, 8 years later, my husband and I had another daughter.

Vợ chồng bà Nguyễn Thị Lê - ông Lê Xuân Hiển
Mrs. Nguyen Thi Le - Mr. Le Xuan Hien. Photo: Minh Quan.

After my husband returned from the Central Highlands, we moved to live in Dien Ky commune, near Dien Chau town. Mr. Hien continued to work in the district's education sector for a while, then moved to the district's political center, then the Dien Chau district party committee, while I continued to work as a book distributor until I retired in 2009. Six years later, in 2015, after Mr. Hien retired, we returned to our hometown to live in Van Tap village, Minh Chau commune.

Retired, returning to the countryside but still loving and active in movement activities, my husband and I are involved in local mass activities. I participate in women's association activities, and Mr. Hien is an exemplary village cadre, dedicated to his work. One of the milestones that we feel proud of is that we have restored the activities of the Dien Binh Commune Mass Arts and Sports Club, which was famous in the 1980s, bringing the local cultural, arts, physical education and sports movement to develop vigorously again. By 2018, from more than 10 active members of this club, with a passion and understanding of Vi and Giam folk songs, we established the Dien Binh Commune Vi and Giam Folk Song Club, now the Minh Chau Commune Vi and Giam Folk Song Club, and I have been the club's Chairman since then.

It must be added that, since I was still active in the local movement, I was already a famous folk singer. During my years in the district, although I worked in the field of book publishing, I was also one of the core artists of the district, often performing with the district's mass art troupe in the province and many other provinces and cities, where in addition to performing, I also wrote scripts and composed new lyrics for folk songs and ballads.

Ông Lê Xuân Hiển (người kéo nhị) và bà Nguyễn Thị Lê tại một buổi sinh hoạt của CLB Dân ca ví, giặm xã Minh Châu
Meritorious Artist Nguyen Thi Le (third from left) and Mr. Le Xuan Hien (playing the two-stringed fiddle) at a meeting of the Vi and Giam Folk Song Club of Minh Chau commune. Photo: NVCC.

As for the Minh Chau Commune Vi and Giam Folk Song Club, the club currently has nearly 30 members in many different professions, from farmers, construction workers, small traders to civil servants and teachers. The club maintains activities at least once a month at the commune cultural house and hamlets, mainly practicing singing Nghe Tinh folk songs, Vi and Giam with ancient lyrics, collecting, compiling, writing new lyrics and organizing practice sessions for members, people who love Vi and Giam folk songs in the area.

In addition, the club also participates in performing at local cultural events such as festivals, new rural reception, clan congresses... and especially organizes exchanges with many folk song clubs in the province as well as in neighboring provinces such as Thai Binh, Hoa Binh... With contributions to the preservation and dissemination of Vi and Giam folk songs, in 2022, I was honored to be awarded the title of Meritorious Artist by the President.

PV:Behind that title of Meritorious Artisan, there must be the silent contribution of your husband, Mr. Le Xuan Hien?

Meritorious Artisan Nguyen Thi Le:Yes! As I said, we used to participate together and become the core of the local cultural and artistic movement since we were very young. During the years working in the district, although in different fields, Mr. Hien always encouraged and created conditions for me to participate in the district's movement activities.

Vợ chồng bà Nguyễn Thị Lê - ông Lê Xuân Hiển 2
Mrs. Nguyen Thi Le and Mr. Le Xuan Hien at the ceremony to award the title of People's Artisan and Meritorious Artisan of Nghe An province at the end of 2022. Photo: NVCC

Retiring to our hometown, we joined together in the village and commune's movement activities like when we were young. Mr. Hien is also an active member of the Arts and Sports Club and the Folk Songs and Vi Giam Club of Minh Chau Commune. My husband's companionship has given me more motivation and excitement in organizing activities to spread Vi Giam folk songs.

PV:After more than 40 years together, have there ever been any storms in your married life, and how did you overcome them?

Meritorious Artisan Nguyen Thi Le:It can be said that my husband and I are very lucky to have known each other since we were children, and then gradually understood each other through participating in local group activities before getting married. Therefore, in general, we have had a warm family life.

Vợ chồng bà Nguyễn Thị Lê - ông Lê Xuân Hiển_1
Mrs. Nguyen Thi Le and Mr. Le Xuan Hien always frankly share their thoughts and feelings with each other. Photo: Minh Quan

However, in the married life of the couple, there are sometimes small waves. As mentioned, I am an extrovert, the core of the mass art troupe of Dien Chau district, quite "popular with girls" when I was young and often performed away from home. Therefore, it is inevitable that I will be "flirted with sweet words", then gossiped about... When Mr. Hien found out about those things, he could not help but show jealousy and anger. But as a lover and understanding of his wife, he quickly regained his composure, frankly shared his feelings and expressed his trust in his wife, at the same time encouraged me to continue participating in art activities.

My husband's love and trust make me admire him and it has been the "stronghold" that helps me avoid temptations, overcome criticism to have a happy family life until today.

Meritorious Artist Nguyen Thi Le - Head of the Vi and Giam Folk Song Club of Minh Chau Commune (Dien Chau).

PV:I also know that in family life, my grandparents also experienced a loss, a great pain...

Meritorious Artisan Nguyen Thi Le:In 2007, a major event happened to my family when my first and only son passed away at the age of 25 after a traffic accident, leaving behind a young wife and a 7-month-old daughter. Before that, he graduated from the Political Department of the Institute of Journalism and Propaganda (now the Academy of Journalism and Propaganda - PV), married a classmate from Bac Giang province and then brought his wife back to his hometown. At that time, our son was working at the District Political Center, and our daughter-in-law was selling goods in Dien Ky commune.

Losing our only son was a great and irreparable loss for my wife and I. However, what we worried about most was the future of our daughter-in-law and grandson. My daughter-in-law became a widow at the age of 25, and my grandson was no longer held by his father every day. Therefore, my wife and I poured all our love into the mother and son, treating our daughter-in-law as our daughter, often being close to her and talking to her to help her gradually ease her pain. My wife and I also found her a government job to have a more stable income.

However, as a woman, I understand that my daughter-in-law will need a man to rely on, so after the death anniversary of my son, I advised my daughter-in-law to go to the temple to perform a ceremony to end her marriage so that she could remarry. After that, she also had a few men come to her, but the special thing was that she confided everything to me, and then came to the decision that "I will not remarry because I am afraid of being away from my parents, afraid that no parents-in-law will love me more than my parents!". After that, during her work, she strived and matured, becoming a member of the District Party Committee, a delegate of the District People's Council, and Secretary of the Party Committee of a commune in Dien Chau district. My grandson is an excellent student at Nguyen Xuan On High School.

bà Nguyễn Thị Lê cùng con gái (bên trái), cháu nội (bên phải) và các cháu ngoại
Meritorious Artisan Nguyen Thi Le with her daughter (left) and grandchildren. Photo: NVCC

In addition, my daughter also has a happy family, with 2 grandsons who are both obedient and good at studying. Compared to many other couples, I do not have many children and grandchildren, but between my husband and I and our children and grandchildren, and our in-laws, there is always a strong bond. In the locality, my family has been voted a typical cultural family for many years.

PV:According to you, what is the "secret" to a family's happiness and strong bond?

Meritorious Artisan Nguyen Thi Le:A happy family is not only about having enough material things but also about everyone in the family being healthy, having stable jobs, always living in harmony, and caring for each other. Surely, each family will have effective ways to balance work and family, to try to keep the values ​​of happiness intact. As for my family, happiness is simply being loved, understood and shared.

Vợ chồng ông Hiển - bà Lê cùng biểu diễn trong một chương trình văn nghệ ở địa phương
Mr. Hien and Mrs. Le (middle) perform together in a local art program. Photo: NVCC

To have a peaceful and happy life like now, my husband and I have also gone through many difficulties. Those were economic difficulties, then separation when we first moved in together, inevitable conflicts and disagreements, and even losses as I have mentioned. But we always determined that love and sharing are the core of family happiness and each member must truly be the one to build a home. Everyone has shortcomings and I firmly believe that, with love, understanding and sharing, only family members have enough kindness, generosity and patience to help each other refine and perfect.

Whenever we encounter difficulties in life, when we are sad or happy... family is the first place my husband and I want to return to, and the husband and wife are the first people each of us wants to share all our feelings with.

Meritorious Artist Nguyen Thi Le - Head of the Vi and Giam Folk Song Club of Minh Chau Commune (Dien Chau)

From there, empathy, understanding, and trust between husband and wife increased, and only when trust in each other is complete will happiness be full. My husband and I have had that trust for more than 40 years and we always try to spread that to the next generation, always striving to make our family "exemplary grandparents and parents, filial children and grandchildren".

PV:CThank you for this chat!

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