My husband said he was always ready for a divorce since he married me.
My current life is no different from a single mother. Every month my husband sends child support and visits the child once every 2 months. Each person takes care of their own needs.
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I am 29 years old, my husband is one year older, we studied in the same university class and started dating in the middle of the 4th year, now we have been married for nearly 3 years, have a baby boy of one and a half years old, blessedly he is chubby and adorable, everyone wants to hold him. Currently I work in Hanoi, and my husband works in Dien Bien, he gets to visit home for a week every 2 months, he has worked there since he graduated, it has been more than 6 years now. My husband and I have nothing outstanding, our jobs, income, and looks are all at an average level. My husband also has many good points, because of these points I chose him among the people pursuing him at that time, he is generous, not stingy with anyone, he also helps if others need it, everyone also likes him.
I don't know where to start about the story between my husband and I, there are too many problems. I'm in a mess and can't find a way out.Since giving birth, I no longer have much time for myself or my husband, because my husband is not home, so my mother and I have to help take care of the child (I do not live with my husband's family). I don't remember the last time I went out to meet friends, because it's been so long; I also don't remember the last time I went shopping for clothes, because I didn't have time to go out and choose, so I always bought them online. Maybe everything started from here, from the time I no longer had time for my husband.
By chance, I discovered that a girl was texting his phone. This went on for more than a year. The two of them called themselves husband and wife and were very affectionate. They contacted each other almost every day, sometimes sending dozens of messages a day. I talked to the girl and told her that I was his wife and asked them not to do that. She said they had never met because she was in Thanh Hoa and my husband was in Dien Bien. They were just friends and had communicated online, nothing had happened. So her and my husband being like this had no effect on my family's happiness. If my husband and I divorced because of her, she would be very sad. I thanked her and that was it.
When I told my husband, the result was a huge argument. My husband said it was my fault, he no longer trusted me, I was bad, I didn't sympathize with him, the fact that I shared articles about adultery online and made comments affected his image in the eyes of everyone at work. He couldn't share anything with me, so he needed someone else to share with. If I tried to relieve stress by reading news online or posting, he had his own way. I told him that if he found his wife unsuitable, he should get a divorce, I couldn't live with the two of us "sharing the same bed, dreaming different dreams", my husband said he was always ready for a divorce since he married me. I didn't say anything because I felt disappointed and tired. Then I didn't look into things further because what's out of sight is out of mind, and besides, up to this moment, I still really love my husband but I know he doesn't love me anymore, for him now he only has responsibility for the children.
I must add that since my mother-in-law had an accident, the relationship between my husband's family and I has not been good, especially between me and my father-in-law. Although they live far away, they sometimes arrange to come visit their grandchildren, because I cannot arrange to come back. But every time he comes, he finds an excuse to talk about me, and when he talks for a long time without seeing any reaction from me, he also curses my parents. My husband knows about this because I told him, the main purpose is to let him understand that I did nothing wrong, he also sympathizes because he knows his father's personality and tells me to be patient. But "even a worm will turn", after each curse, his last sentence is always "You went to university but it's like you didn't, can't your parents teach you, you're a naughty child without anyone to teach you", I told him that it was okay for him to curse me but not to touch my parents, he had no right to teach my parents. One time he asked me to go to the hospital for a check-up. I called to ask how he was doing. Before I could say anything, he said, "I don't want to talk to you." From then on, I didn't ask him anything again.
My husband doesn't remember my birthday so he never congratulates me, I don't ask for flowers or gifts because he lives far away. On days like March 8th or October 20th, he rarely texts to congratulate me, but at the company he still organizes for the ladies. Many times when I go online and see people showing off gifts, flowers, and messages from my husband congratulating me, I feel so sad. One time I couldn't hold back and burst into tears at the company. When people asked me, I said the baby kicked hard and it hurt, so I cried.
From these things, the distance between my husband and I is getting further and further. Now my child has learned to run, babbles, every day my husband calls to talk to the child once in the evening, the rest of the time when I call, he only picks up occasionally, if I text, he rarely texts back. When I ask, he says he is busy, or doesn't receive messages, while I know he is on his phone 24/7, even when he is taking a bath. Many times I think, if something happens to me and my child, or if something happens to me on the road, he should be the last person to know.
My current life is no different from a single mother. Every month my husband sends child support, visits the child once every 2 months, each person takes care of their own, there is no care or sharing. I have thought about divorce several times, I have also written a petition but I have not dared to submit it because I still love my husband and do not want to lose this marriage. Please give me sincere advice. Thank you very much.
According to VNE
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