'The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother'

In just one sentence, Mr. Theodore Hesburgh (1917-2015, President of Notre Dame University - USA for 35 years) summarized the most important thing that parents can do for their children, which is to love each other.

American psychologist Gary Chapman asserts that it is absolutely correct to say that the best way to love your children is to love the person who gave birth to them.

In the book “5 Love Languages ​​for Children” (Tre Publishing House), Dr. Gary Chapman believes that married life greatly affects the way you behave with your children as well as the way they receive that love.

If you have a good marriage—where both spouses treat each other with kindness, respect, and integrity—then you and your partner will feel loved by each other and work together to raise your children.

On the other hand, if you are constantly criticizing and unloving, it will be difficult for both of you to raise good children. And your children – who are very sensitive – will quickly notice this.

In the book “7 Habits for a Happy Family” (Tre Publishing House), Dr. Stephen Covey, an American educator, writer, businessman and speaker, also emphasized: “The stability of a marriage will create a sense of security in the whole family. Because the most essential relationship in a family is the relationship between husband and wife. The quality of this relationship will determine the quality of family life.”

In the book “Heartfelt Advice” (Phuong Dong Publishing House), His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama teaches: “If happiness permeates the family, and human values ​​are respected, not only parents but also children can live in a happy and relaxing atmosphere, and who knows, that atmosphere will continue to exist for generations to come.

If parents speak politely to each other, live morally, love and respect each other, help others and care about the world around them, then their children will have a greater hope of behaving like them in their lives, and they will act as people who are aware of their responsibilities."

The Dalai Lama also pointed out that, “if parents constantly quarrel and insult each other, expressing in action whatever comes to their minds and have no respect for each other, not only will they never know what happiness is, but of course their children will have to suffer the consequences.”

Discord between parents affects children in many ways, including their ability to learn. According to molecular biologist John Media in his book “Brain Laws” (Labor and Social Publishing House), stress at home is deeply related to children’s ability to do well in school, when they grow up and enter the workforce. Marital stress in the family can negatively affect children’s academic performance, to any extent and at almost any age. Notably, when children grow up, the effects of childhood stress can still be felt.

Discord between parents affects children in many ways. Illustrative photo

Certainly, maintaining a marriage is not easy. But if parents think about the healthy development of their children in many ways, they will know what to do. According to American leadership expert John C. Maxwell, “a successful marriage is one that moves from crisis to crisis with increasing intimacy. Like anything you fight for, marriage requires discipline and commitment.”

One can achieve a goal only when one makes it a top priority. When both parents are committed to maintaining a harmonious family atmosphere with love and respect for each other, the whole family will benefit, and the children will be the happiest.

According to Dantri