The happiness of a disabled man and a female economics graduate

The fateful fall

These days, Pham Dinh Khoa (born in 1986) and Nguyen Thi Tai (born in 1987) are anxiously awaiting their first child, as the wife is 9 months pregnant. Their livelihood has been temporarily scaled back to prepare carefully for the birth of a new member after many years of waiting.

“Our love and married life is a long story, with both joy and happiness, as well as pain and anxiety. Above all, there is sharing, sympathy, and determination to build a warm family” - Pham Dinh Khoan shared.

Pham Dinh Khoan with online advertising work. Photo: Cong Kien

Khoan, from Thanh Hoa commune (Thanh Chuong), used to be a good student, tall, strong and talented in sports, especially volleyball. In 2006, as a second-year student at Vinh University of Technology and Education, after a volleyball exchange, near evening Khoan went to the second floor of the boarding house to rest.

And just a moment of carelessness caused the student to slip and fall... When he woke up, he realized that he had just undergone surgery at Viet Duc Hospital and had been in treatment for months. It was even more painful when Khoan learned that he had a broken cervical vertebra and was facing the risk of paralysis.

Pham Dinh Khoan cried a lot because of pain and despair. In his twenties, he was full of vitality, with so many good things waiting ahead, but suddenly he became disabled, which was no different from living for nothing. His dream of becoming a mechanical engineer was put on hold forever, and from now on he had to lie still, relying on the support of his relatives for all his daily activities.

One day, Khoan woke up and saw tears welling up in his mother’s aged eyes and her face had become haggard. Khoan’s father was also emaciated, his eyes were sunken, and his hair was white. To have money to treat their son, Khoan’s parents sold all their property, leaving only a few of their herd of more than 10 buffaloes and cows.

Then the remaining cows also died because there was no one at home to take care of them, the fields and gardens had to be abandoned, and the economy became exhausted.

Feeling sorry for his parents who had to endure so much hardship and suffering for him, day and night busy worrying, not having a single full night's sleep, even though he was still in great pain, Khoan still tried to endure... He tried to suppress the pain that was tormenting his body, tried to eat and drink so that everyone could be happy. And more importantly, through the love and care of his family, Khoan realized his duty was to fight fate...

Pham Dinh Khoan and Nguyen Thi Tai are happy on their wedding day. Photo: Cong Kien

Going to all the hospitals from the South to the North, wherever they knew of a place that could treat cervical spine, their parents took them there for treatment. It took 4 long years for Pham Dinh Khoan to be able to move a little. Despite his best efforts, Khoan was still paralyzed from the waist down, unable to move the left side of his body.

However, he still decided to stand on his own two feet, despite the pain and suffering. His efforts paid off when he was able to move on his feet by holding on to the wall of his house, then on a wheelchair, then on a homemade motorbike.

Struggling to find happiness

The old dream also revived, Khoan hoped to return to school to have a better future, so as not to be a burden to his parents when they are old. But for a person with hemiplegia, he could not continue to pursue the major of Mechanical Engineering, but had to find another major that was suitable for his physical condition.

His parents created conditions for Khoan to go to Hanoi to study at Estih School (a school specializing in training information technology for the disabled). After two years of “swimming” alone in Hanoi, he became more aware of the hardships, difficulties and worries of his parents. Therefore, he had to try to overcome everything, not to make his parents in the countryside sad.

After graduating, Pham Dinh Khoan chose Vinh city to start a career, because information technology is developing strongly here, only a few dozen kilometers from home so he has the opportunity to visit his parents often. Khoan chose the field of online business and advertising to operate, this is a fairly new field and requires basic knowledge of information technology and perseverance, hard work as well as the ability to work in a team.

Having been trained quite systematically, Khoan has achieved certain successes, first of all with a stable income and expanded relationships. Not only supporting himself, he also saved money to send back home to help his parents. During his work, Pham Dinh Khoan met and gradually became close to Nguyen Thi Tai - a girl one year younger than him, graduated in Economics (Vinh University).

Tai is from Hoa Son commune (Anh Son), also chose Vinh and online advertising to start a business. The two have many similarities in thinking, life and work concepts, so they often talk, share joys and sorrows and become more and more attached. Tai admires the determination and will of the young man from Thanh Chuong, while Khoan always sees Tai's enthusiasm and dynamism.

Pham Dinh Khoan and Nguyen Thi Tai are preparing to welcome their first child. Photo: Cong Kien

Love came without warning, when the two realized they could not live without each other, they decided to build a happy home. Unfortunately, Tai's parents strongly opposed, not wanting their daughter to spend her life with a disabled man.

But perhaps it was fate, the girl insisted on being with the man she loved so her parents had to agree. The wedding was held at the end of 2013 in the joy and happiness of the young couple.

Working together, Khoan and his wife's income increased and their business scale expanded. At one point, the rented room had more than 20 computers, creating jobs for people in the same situation with an income of 4-5 million VND/month. With the money they saved, the couple invested in buying machines and hiring workers; bought 14 hectares of forest in Que Phong district to plant trees and hire caretakers; and have now bought residential land in Vinh city.

Family life is full of challenges, the biggest challenge for Khoan and his wife is having children. After several years of marriage, the wife still could not get pregnant. Finally, Khoan and his wife packed up and went to Hanoi to undergo artificial insemination.

It took the second attempt to succeed. When the doctor announced the results, Khoan was so happy he cried, because his dream of becoming a father had come true, despite all the hardships and expenses...

While chatting, Khoan and Tai arranged clothes and other items for the newborn, their faces shining with happiness. Khoan confided: “Happiness is the result of a journey with a lot of effort, there is no room for discouragement and giving up. There are many challenges ahead, but my husband and I will work together to overcome them.”