Small stone, big wall

When I got home from work today, I saw my nephew sitting with his chin resting on his hand in front of a perfectly pressed suit spread out on the bed. Concerned, I asked him what was wrong:

- Where are you going all dressed up like that? And why do you look so sad?

- My classmate is getting married tomorrow. That's the third wedding this month, Uncle. Every time I go to a wedding, I have to ask for time off or even take a day off without permission because I lose a whole day. And on top of that, I lose the money I'd give as a gift. I'm just a new employee, how much do I earn, and now there are weddings all the time? I'm so miserable, Uncle!

I was surprised; it was just a wedding, but it took a whole day—wasn't that like attending a family memorial service? My beloved nephew explained it to me like this:

When a wedding takes place at noon, the young people from the old class have to arrive at the bride's (or groom's) house early in the morning, ostensibly to help with chores, but mostly to gather and chat. The boys wander around for a while, then go for coffee, dressing up nicely for everyone to admire. The girls, meanwhile, are busy getting their hair and makeup done, as elaborate as the bride herself! After a while, it's time to take the bride to the wedding venue... and that's the end of the morning! But that's not the end of the wedding preparations. It's rare for the old class to get together in such large numbers, so this is a golden opportunity to... offer congratulations! Therefore, the young people who are friends of the bride and groom are almost always the most enthusiastic guests, staying to celebrate until the very end. That means it's well into the early afternoon...

But the wedding wasn't over yet, or at least not for the young guests. After the celebratory food and drinks, everyone was in high spirits. After a long time apart, a warm welcome was inevitable, so to prolong that precious moment, perhaps we should all go for a karaoke session? If you pass a karaoke bar during the day and see a row of cars and motorbikes parked outside, there's a 99.99% chance those are groups of guests coming from a wedding. After singing and having a good time, feeling tired and tipsy, let's grab a bowl of hot porridge to sober up so we can have some tea and chat later tonight. A classmate's wedding is truly a wonderful and perfectly fitting occasion to rekindle friendships!

I was stunned after hearing this. I thought that in the past, weddings and funerals, following traditional customs, were already incredibly lengthy, but it turns out they're still far behind the wedding-attending culture of young people today. Is this really a positive and encouraging innovation, considering the considerable amount of time spent on it? And what about the consequences that arise: excessive drinking and revelry affecting health and even the lives of individuals and the community; a lack of focus and fatigue after the festivities, impacting daily life, studies, and work afterward; and so on and so forth. But above all, what saddens and worries me most is that this phenomenon reflects an undisciplined and irresponsible lifestyle. We need to determine what time should be dedicated to and how much is enough and reasonable. The general trend in society is to rejuvenate the workforce; this is a sign of respect and trust that the community places in young people. But if young people lack self-control, are lenient with themselves and fleeting pleasures, forgetting the responsibilities they bear, forgetting the qualities a mature person and an active citizen should possess, then where will this society end up?

What would happen if an organization had about 10 young people (and surely the actual number is much higher) and they all simultaneously decided to attend a wedding for an entire day? This illustrates that each of us is a small but crucial part of society – if we first and foremost respect our own roles and responsibilities. Do young people today want to be just a small pebble on the sidelines or a large wall supporting the future?

Hai Trieu