The ceremony to make the new bride happy of the Thai community in Nghe An

For other communities, after the wedding, the bride returns to her husband's house, officially becoming a member of the husband's family, and many important things may have just begun. As for the Thai community in Western Nghe An, the bride will continue to be welcomed by her husband's relatives with a number of traditional rituals and customs, through which, to create a bond of solidarity and attachment, helping the new bride feel confident as if she were returning to her own home. "Eagerness" and giving gifts to the new bride are cultural features with that meaning.

Thai bride and groom have a "lively" ceremony after the wedding day. Photo: Luong Nga

Since ancient times, in the wedding ceremonies of the Thai people in mountainous districts such as Que Phong, Quy Chau, Quy Hop (Nghe An), when the bride comes to her husband's house, she always brings dowry gifts such as mattresses, pillows, blankets, Thai dresses embroidered with colorful patterns... woven by herself to give to her husband's family. Although these gifts are not of high value, they show the daughter-in-law's heart and gratitude to her husband's family.

In the past, when a Thai girl was only 13 years old, she had to go to the forest to pick cotton, dry it, and pluck its flowers to use as raw materials; and find many other plants to dye brocade. Young girls also had to learn to weave and embroider. The more skillful a girl was, the more the boys in the village would notice her. Parents also looked at her behavior, her diligence, and the items she created to choose her as a daughter-in-law.

Each item that the girl makes before getting married is also given to a different person in her future husband’s family. The skirts with dragon and sun patterns embroidered with silk will be given to her husband’s mother and sisters. The cushions, bed cushions and pillows will be given to her grandparents, aunts and uncles. If the girl is about to get married and has not yet finished preparing, the relatives can join hands to help or provide 1 or 2 sets of bedding and other items. And when the relatives have children getting married, they will help in return.

Thai girls weave brocade as a dowry when they get married. Photo: Sach Nguyen

After the wedding ceremonies are completed, the bride will return to her husband's house and 3-4 days later, the groom's relatives will choose a good day to welcome the bride to their house to perform the "hang van" (celebration) ceremony for the young couple. The bride will bring her gift to the host to show gratitude to the relatives of the husband's family. Next, the host will invite a shaman to perform the "hang van" ceremony. The offering tray is placed in the main room of the house, on the tray is boiled young pig, the meat is chopped into small pieces and arranged around the tray, in the middle is white sticky rice, the pig's feet, tail and head must be left intact and facing the ancestral altar.

This offering tray represents the prosperity and well-being of the husband's family, with the wish that the young couple will feel more secure about their future life. Next to it are two lit beeswax candles placed neatly on the offering tray. The light of the candles seems to say that despite the rain and sun, the bond of love will never fade, the couple should support each other, together overcome the difficulties in life. On the offering tray are also placed 2 bowls, in which one bowl is white salt, the other bowl will be filled with meat and sticky rice by the shaman to reserve for the young couple. Two plates, 1 with 2 pieces of betel and areca nuts, 1 empty plate to receive gifts from relatives. On the tray are also 6 pairs of chopsticks and 2 cups of wine. All the items on the offering tray must be in even numbers.

After the shaman finishes the ceremony, the young couple will drink 2 cups of white wine together, eat a portion of sticky rice and pork in the bowl, then take 2 pieces of betel and areca nuts and put them in their mouths. At the same time, relatives of the groom's family will come to bless and give gifts to the bride. The gifts include cash, new fabrics or silver bracelets. While giving gifts, the bride's mother-in-law will introduce each person's position so that the bride can gradually get acquainted. Next, everyone will hold the young couple's hands to tie a lucky thread and give the best wishes to the young couple. Finally, each person will come to the offering tray, take a little sticky rice and meat, dip it in white salt and put it in their mouths, taste a little spicy wine as if they want to share with the young couple the difficulties and wish for a prosperous future.

A bride prepares to go to her husband's house. Photo: PV

After the ceremony, everyone will gather around the dinner table, toast each other with a glass of wine and talk about the future plans of the young couple. The warm atmosphere in the family creates a sense of closeness for the bride, not feeling strange when she becomes the daughter-in-law of her husband's family.

Nowadays, the wedding ceremony of the Thai people has become simpler and less cumbersome, however, the spirit and good values ​​of those customs are still preserved. The gifts given to the groom's family have also been reduced. Depending on the actual conditions of both the paternal and maternal sides, gifts are prepared. To avoid wasting time and money when performing the "exciting" ceremony and giving gifts, people now often organize it right at the groom's house instead of welcoming each relative's house like before.

Even though life has changed, the “eager” ceremony shows the gratitude of children to their ancestors, grandparents, parents and relatives. It shows the love and solidarity of the Thai community. This is also the parents’ teaching to their children for a better life.