Words are like swords…

Last week, the two hottest stories on social media were both related to love: one was the engagement of a famous businessman to a well-known actress; the other was the sincere sharing of a beauty queen after her coronation about her boyfriend. Actually, both were happy stories, but sadly, social media is like a dye shop where when passing through the mouths of many people, everything seems to change color!

“Looks like a love grave”, “Loyal design full of sound”, “As messy as a tombstone”… are a few of the countless rude comments about the design of the engagement ceremony space of the famous couple. Many wedding party designers said that the design was inspired by the Indochine style - a combination of two Eastern and Western cultures, with white and blue tones, creating a cool feeling, lotus flowers evoking the elegance and gentleness of traditional Vietnamese girls, bamboo clumps implying gentlemen… Indochine is also a design style that the actress loves, because through the pictures shared on Facebook, it can be seen that the apartment she has been living in for many years is also designed in the same inspiration.

To clarify, whether the design is beautiful or ugly, luxurious or rustic, impressive or bland… depends on each person’s aesthetic perception. People have different opinions, no one can impose their subjective opinions on anyone else, especially when it comes to preferences. What is worth mentioning here is the attitude towards other people’s family affairs.

Our ancestors taught: "No one cries at a wedding, no one laughs at a funeral", implying that weddings are happy events in life, but in the process of organizing, it is difficult to satisfy and please everyone, so whatever happens, just happily let it go; similarly, filial piety always requires sympathy, because when family matters are confused, there are always places that are not fully taken care of... Deeper down, weddings and funerals are two big events in life, everyone must inevitably go through them, teachings on proper behavior are also implicit reminders for each person to leave a way out for themselves, because "laugh at others today, tomorrow others will laugh at you".

Few words, much meaning, Vietnamese people since childhood, surely all have been taught like that by their parents. Yet in this era of social media, quick brains are fueled by emotionless buttons, stirring up the crowd's pleasure, and then carelessly posting lines of criticism and slander that are so cruel and frightening! Some people say it is well deserved, very satisfying (because the bride is considered a "third person"); others viciously predict the relationship's early bloom and early decline; some even... write toad poems, with sarcastic rhymes, thinking it is humorous...

Similarly, the story of a beauty queen who was just crowned at the age of 21 publicly revealing her boyfriend, sincerely sharing about her 6-year relationship also created a wave of public opinion that was beyond control. Some people congratulated her, others laughed at her. The image of the beauty queen’s boyfriend was found by netizens in the blink of an eye, and all sorts of expressions were put on his face. The beautiful youthful love through the keyboard of the world turned into a childish love that was not taken seriously. There were comments like “I lost my lover”, “happiness is fragile”, “beauty queens must love rich men to be worthy”…

When she innocently shared about her private feelings, the beauty queen must have simply thought that she was telling the truth, and she openly expressed it proudly, without hiding anything. That is the positive, straightforward and responsible attitude of a typical GenZ. However, it seems that life's many events have caused the trust of most netizens to wane, so after that statement, social networks were flooded with uncivilized, tactless, and even uncultured comments and predictions!

The two stories that made waves on Facebook last week have one thing in common: they both had to endure the gossip and harsh words of the world. Gossip is invisible, sharper than any weapon in this world. Words are like daggers, like sharp swords, freely thrown around without regard for the consequences. Hidden behind the flashing screens, mindless keyboards, and unverified fake accounts, evil intentions just pour out, not caring how much pressure and suffering their few comments will cause others. The pressure of life seems to be compressed and accumulated in the mind, and then when they go online, they burst out, venting their anger into the virtual space, saying whatever they want to say. Social media is a place to express opinions, but at the same time it is also a double-edged sword: wanting to prove that we are knowledgeable people, people who understand morality better than others. So, just waiting for something hot to jump in to comment, analyze, speak to relieve anger, to satisfy, even unconsciously follow the crowd mentality.

Buddhism has the concept of harsh speech and verbal karma. Listening to the Buddha's teachings about the consequences that people with harsh speech must bear is truly terrifying. One harsh word in real life can cause trouble to one or two other people; but on social networks, the consequences of harsh speech, of the like and share buttons are much more terrible, can multiply into tens of thousands, even millions of other harsh words. And so, the verbal karma of one person can drag countless others into the verbal karma. Even if one is not a Buddhist, does not know or believe in profound philosophies, the obvious thing that a decent person living in normal life needs to think about is "turning the tongue seven times before speaking". Because words can spread fragrance, or can be a sharp sword...