Keep the promise 'wait for you to come back'

(Baonghean) - Mother waiting for her child, wife waiting for her husband, for many years these two women have relied on each other, relied on their memories and nostalgia to continue living, to continue waiting for the soldiers who never returned.

"I told my children, 'when the country is lost, the family is lost'. When the enemy comes here, the family will be destroyed, the village will no longer exist. So I let any child who asks to join the army join. They go to the battlefield to fight the enemy, to prevent the enemy from destroying their homeland..." With cloudy eyes and white hair, she is 105 years old this year, but mother Dang Thi Hai of Hung Dong commune, Vinh city is still lucid, her voice is still clear when talking about her children.

Vietnamese Heroic Mother Dang Thi Hai, Yen Binh hamlet, Hung Dong, Vinh city (105 years old)

Her husband died early, mother Dang Thi Hai worked hard doing all kinds of jobs: growing vegetables, running the market... to raise 9 children. At that time, the war was fierce, mother sent her children to the battlefield one by one. In 1965, when he was a 10th grade student, the second son Hoang Van Hien volunteered to join the army. In 1968, following the general mobilization order "all people are soldiers" when the US attacked the North, the eldest brother Hoang Van Vinh volunteered to re-enlist. Then, the youngest son Hoang Van Cong also "backpacked a toad" to join the battlefield in Cambodia.

“That day, my husband Vinh volunteered to re-enlist when our youngest daughter was only 3 months old. I carried my child and ran after him, he turned around and just said, “Try to stay home and take care of the child, wait for me to come back”. I stood there not knowing what to say, just crying, and my mother encouraged me to let Vinh go, don’t stop him...” - Mrs. Tran Thi Trinh, Hai’s daughter-in-law, recalled.

So, one by one, her sons rushed into the bomb-filled battlefield to protect the Fatherland. At home, her two daughters, Hoang Thi Xuan and Hoang Thi Chien, and daughter-in-law Tran Thi Trinh (wife of Hoang Van Vinh) joined the youth volunteer force, serving at anti-aircraft artillery positions to protect Vinh city, Ben Thuy bridge...

Mother's house became a place to store food and ammunition for the soldiers. Her children participated in transporting the wounded, transporting ammunition, and taking care of the wounded. Raising the soldiers like her own children, Mother hoped that they would be healthy enough to fight the enemy. She hoped above all that the war would end, waiting for the day of peace, so that her children could return... She cared for and loved her children, and she held back her tears and hid her anxiety as she sent them off to the battlefield...

Hai's mother and daughter-in-law Tran Thi Trinh (81 years old), wife of martyr Tran Van Vinh. Photo: Nguyen Sach

Then the youngest son Hoang Van Cong also returned with an 81% disability. The eldest son Hoang Van Vinh died in 1969 on the southern front and the second son Hoang Van Hien died on the march to the South after just over half a year of enlistment. They remained on the battlefield but their mother did not know, the war was so brutal that it was not until peace was restored that the death notice was sent back...

Their graves have not yet been found. At home, their mothers and wives stand by the door every day waiting for their brothers to return... Mothers wait for their children, wives wait for their husbands, for so many years these two women have relied on each other, relied on their memories and longings to continue living, to continue hoping for news of the soldiers lying somewhere on the battlefield.

The war has receded into the past. Mother’s hair is white, her daughter-in-law’s back is also bent, but the graves of Nguyen Van Vinh and Nguyen Van Hien are still unknown. Vinh joined the army and had time to write a few short letters home, while Hien only had time to tell his comrades to “tell mom to buy me a flashlight and a parachute cloth to go in the forest at night.”

“Mom loved Uncle Hien the most. When he left, he was still very young. He was cheerful and kind. He had a girlfriend named Dan. When he joined the army, Uncle Hien refused to let him make any promises. He only said that war was unpredictable. If anything happened to him, don't wait for him and make him suffer.

Before leaving, Uncle Hien gave all his clothes to his friends, even took off his belt and gave it to his friend, saying: "You don't need it anymore after joining the army, so why keep it?" Then he left forever," Mrs. Trinh recalled, still keeping in her memory the most beautiful images of her young, mischievous brother-in-law.

The three-room wooden house was once a gathering place for the whole family.

By October 2013, the Marin Center for Legal Advice and Legal Aid for Martyrs' Families discovered a group of 25 martyrs' graves belonging to Regiment 29 at the Road 9 Martyrs' Cemetery, Quang Tri Province. Based on the information obtained at the graves as well as the information matching of the IV Military Region Command, the Marin Center relied on the information obtained at the graves, contacted the IV Military Region Command to find out the names and hometowns of these 25 martyrs, including Mr. Hoang Van Hien, son of Dang Thi Hai.

After so many years of waiting, the mother finally got the news that one of her two sons had died. But now she was very old and weak! Hearing the news, her tears dried up and she had no more tears to cry, she was both happy and sad and hurt. “In the past, he wanted to join the army, he told me to wait for him, when he came back I would cook for him. But now that I can find him, I can’t go pick him up,” Hai’s mother choked up.

“After receiving the official information, with the help of the Marin Center, the brothers in the family gathered together, asked for confirmation of documents, and then went to the cemetery on Road 9, Quang Tri. After conducting DNA tests, it was proven that the grave found was indeed the grave of Hoang Van Hien. So after nearly 50 years, our family has found the grave of a brother, but Vinh is still missing. On July 27, my family will go to Quang Tri to burn incense for him. I only feel sorry for my mother, now at an age near the end of her life, but I still feel the pain of having a brother on the battlefield,” said Mr. Hoang Van Cong - Hai's youngest son.

In 2015, mother Dang Thi Hai was recognized by the State as a “Heroic Vietnamese Mother” at the age of 104. Due to her advanced age and poor health, she could no longer live alone and returned to live with her youngest son. The old wooden house where she used to live, where she raised her children and soldiers... is now closed. Occasionally, she asks her children and grandchildren to take her back. Next door is the house of Mrs. Tran Thi Trinh, who is also over 80 years old. The mother and son sat sharing a piece of crushed betel, each recalling old memories.

In the house, there is still a black and white photo with the young, fresh faces of the brothers, unchanged. But outside the door, the traces of time have been imprinted on the faces and figures of the mother and wife. After so many years, love and longing still ache, and when there is someone who has not returned, there is still a shadow of someone sitting on the porch waiting, keeping the promise before leaving...

Quynh Luong