3 mistakes Vietnamese parents make when their children do homework
Many parents believe that if they do not participate and control their children's homework, their children will become distracted and do poorly in school. However, according to experts, the opposite is true. Parental help can have a negative impact on children's academic performance.
1. Makes children lose motivation to learn
According to one study, the more parents get involved in their children's homework, the less interested they become in learning.
When parents sit next to them and tell them what to do, control every step, and even do their homework, children will have no motivation at all. Meanwhile, children who are not "pushed" by their parents to study have a greater desire to learn and explore new things.
Parents should remember to only help when their children ask. Even when asked, you should only explain things that your child doesn’t understand, not do it for them. If your child can’t do a task, be understanding of how he or she feels. For example, you might acknowledge that your child has the right to not want to copy a boring paragraph or practice writing a letter for 10 consecutive lines. Then, you can share your own methods for completing unwanted tasks.
2. Children do not know how to take responsibility
By keeping track of your child’s homework, monitoring the process, and punishing them for poor grades, you become responsible for their learning. This means that you are removing the responsibility for their learning from them. Therefore, the more controlling you are, the less likely your child will see it as their own.
Being able to take responsibility for your actions is more important than being able to do the job. Experts say to show your child the possible consequences and let him make the choice: "Didn't you do your homework? Explain it to your teacher."
3. Destroy the relationship between parents and children
"Homework is done. Mom's voice is hoarse. Daughter's ears are ringing from the shouting. Neighbors have a chance to learn the poem by heart", is a funny story but in reality it is true, the important thing is that it can ruin the relationship between parents and children.
Instead of controlling each task, psychologists advise you to build a relationship with your child based on trust, spend a lot of time together. Every night, when you have time, you can read aloud while sitting with your child, discuss current events in the world, discuss interesting scientific phenomena, schedule an interesting activity on the weekend to stimulate your child's desire to learn.
If you are not willing to accept your child's bad grades, ask yourself why you are taking them so seriously. Children often feel unloved when they live in a family where a bad grade can change the way they are treated.
According to psychologists, studying is a child's personal task, while a parent's personal task is to love their children unconditionally, because love is more important than grades.
