Parents unintentionally harm their children's future?
If you teach your children the wrong way, they will feel unloved and unheard. When they grow up, they will suffer from stress, anxiety and will do anything to achieve their goals. The following mistakes of parents can affect the psychology of children.
1. Make children afraid but require them to love their parents
For parents with this trait, children often have to guess their parents’ moods through the sound of keys dropping or footsteps. They are always in a state of fear and apprehension. These parents often feel offended if their kind actions are questioned. They often say things like: “I do everything for you and this is how you behave!”
2. Forcing children to share everything but not empowering them
In some families, parents force their children to share responsibility. For example, when a child sees their father drinking too much alcohol, they will believe that because they are not good, their father has to drink alcohol to calm down. Later, the child will also be dragged into the adult's troubles, forced to listen to their parents' complaints, get used to complicated situations and have to learn to put themselves in their parents' shoes, to help, tolerate and comfort. In these cases, children often do not have the right to express their thoughts.
3. Expect your child to be the best but take achievement for granted
Many parents want their children to achieve the best. However, these achievements are often taken for granted by parents. Negative comments can ruin a child’s life because they make them grow up believing that they are a disappointment to their parents.
4. Asking for openness but blaming the child
Many parents often force their children to share everything honestly with them and sometimes they feel guilty if they do not share their feelings with their parents. But then, parents use the things their children share to blame them. Many parents even share that with others without thinking it is wrong.
5. Always remind yourself of your child's failures.
A child with low self-esteem is easier to control. Therefore, many parents often mention their children's failures and shortcomings. But these words and actions can make children feel insecure and afraid to try new things.
6. Wanting your child to succeed but not helping
Parents want their children to succeed but do not care how they do it. These types of parents will only be happy with their children’s achievements for two reasons. They like to brag about their children’s success and their children’s success will ensure a better life for their parents.
7. Want to do things your way but if you fail it's your fault
In this case, parents treat their children like objects. They make plans and expect their children to follow them. However, they do not care about the consequences of controlling all the time. This makes the child think that if something happens, it is their fault.
8. Want children to always listen and stay by their parents' side
In healthy families, parents help their children become independent and live their own lives. But there are many parents who never want their children to leave. Any choice or resistance is ignored in such cases. What they want is for their children to obey them and stay by their side.
9. Forcing parents to trust but always interfering in their children's lives
These parents do not give their children privacy. If their children try to create their own space and territory, these parents accuse them of not trusting them. And their children often have to answer questions like “Why don’t you wash that cup?” or “Why did you waste money on that junk mail?” These parents do not respect their children’s lives and their personal decisions.
