Heartbreaking story of mother with heart disease raising mentally ill child

Looking through the piled-up medical records of mother and child, Mrs. Nguyen Thi Ty (born in 1960) could not hide her grief at having been away from her child for the past month, since the day a philanthropist in Vinh city took her child to Hanoi for mental health treatment.

With red eyes on her gaunt face, Mrs. Ty recounted the disasters that had befallen her once happy little family.

Despite suffering from stage III heart valve disease, Ms. Nguyen Thi Ty still has to struggle to raise her mentally ill child alone after her husband died early. Photo: Quynh Thanh

Mrs. Ty and Mr. Doan Dang Hoa became husband and wife in 1992. Her husband was born in 1955, had been in the army, participated in fighting in the Binh Tri Thien battlefield during the fiercest years of the war. Leaving the battlefield with a head injury, his health had declined significantly. However, for many reasons, the family lost many important documents proving that he had participated in fighting and been injured, so when the State had a support policy, he did not have enough legal documents to benefit.

So, to make a living, he asked to work as a construction worker and porter at markets in and outside the city many times. Because of his poor health, he had to quit his job after a short time. Family life became even more difficult when Mr. Hoa was constantly sick. All the money he had saved up was used to treat his husband's illness.

Loving her husband, Mrs. Ty gritted her teeth and shouldered all the heavy work in the family. Then disaster struck her family when in 2000 he unfortunately fell into a pond and passed away.

For the past month, Mrs. Ty has been hospitalized for treatment, while her son was taken by a philanthropist to Hanoi for psychiatric treatment. Photo: Quynh Thanh

Her husband left, her house became more deserted and lonely. For her children, she tried to overcome her pain by running around to sell vegetables and fish in the markets near and far. The money she earned from each trip to the market was just enough for the two of them to eat porridge and vegetables every day. Whatever money she had left, she saved to pay for her children's education.

But during a trip to the market in mid-2004, she suddenly suffered a severe heart attack and fainted. Relatives and neighbors rushed her to the hospital for examination and painfully received the results from the doctor when she had aortic valve stenosis. The disease was entering a dangerous stage. Since then, every month, she has to go to the hospital for examination and take medicine to maintain her life.

After days of hard work, she was also tormented by a herniated disc. The illness caused the 58-year-old woman to live in pain. Her only consolation was her son Doan Van Hung (born in 1995). He was once the pride of her and her husband as a dutiful son. Despite the difficult family circumstances, he still tried hard to study and became a freshman at Vinh University.

During the months when my mother was sick, I went to school and went to the hospital to take care of her. Whenever I had free time, I asked to work as a porter or a hired hand at Vinh market to earn more money for my mother's medicine.

Mrs. Nguyen Thi Ty's family has been poor for the past 13 years. Photo: Quynh Thanh

But then disaster struck Mrs. Ty's family again when, in his third year of university, Hung showed unusual signs. He no longer wanted to go to class, but just curled up in the corner of the bed, wringing his hands until they were swollen and red. In particular, he did not want to contact anyone. Not even his mother.

Wiping away her tears, Mrs. Ty said: Hung loved his mother so much before, but since he got sick, he hates her so much. Every time his mother comes near, he pushes her away, then curses and screams. When his anger begins to subside, Hung laughs to himself and says meaningless things.

Since her son fell ill, Mrs. Ty has been like a lost soul. Painful, tormented, tears rolling down her face, she silently took her son from place to place for treatment. All the hopes and faith she had placed in her son almost collapsed when the hospital concluded that her son had schizophrenia.

Mrs. Ty's only son, Doan Van Hung, was a student at Vinh University before being diagnosed with schizophrenia. Photo: FB Dam Quynh Ngoc

Her tears had dried up, she sat leaning against the rickety wall and confided: “I have a terminal illness, I don’t know when I will die. I only feel sorry for my mentally ill son who is in the hospital, if I die, who will take care of him after…?!”.