Special mothers at SOS Children's Village Vinh

Bring happiness to each other

In mid-October, we visited the home of Nguyen Thi Dong's mother (45 years old), when she was busy preparing lunch for the whole family.SOS Children's Village VinhThis is Ms. Dong, the mother of 9 children. More than 3 years ago, Ms. Dong was accepted to be a mother here. The day she took care of the children, she was assigned the task of bringing happiness and warmth of family to the children, something that the children unfortunately had from outside.

Ms. Dong with her youngest daughter who is just over 2 years old. Photo: Duc Anh

But Ms. Dong did not expect that after so many years of being together, it was the children who were not born to her that brought her warmth and a family atmosphere. “I still remember the first year I worked here, when my children organized my birthday. That was the first time in my life that I had a birthday party, received flowers and gifts,” Ms. Dong said. That time, she cried a lot. But those were tears of happiness, something she had never been lucky enough to have before working here.

Family meal at Dong's house. Photo: Duc Anh

Ms. Dong comes from a poor commune in Nam Dan district. Like many other mothers and aunts in SOS Children's Village, she has never been married. Without a husband or children, she has to work hard to make a living. "In the past, when I saw all my friends getting married one after another, I was very sad. But now it doesn't mean anything to me anymore, because this is my family," Ms. Dong said, pointing to her children studying.

Mothers recruited at SOS Children's Villages must be unattached to outside family obligations. Photo: Duc Anh

Dong's job sounds simple. It is being a mother. A true mother. In the morning, she goes to the market and buys food for the whole family. Some days she cooks by herself, some days her children help. At the end of the day, she reminds them to do their homework... "The job is that simple, but it is very stressful. The most difficult thing is to teach the children to be good people," she said, adding that among her 9 children, there are 9 different personalities, so each must have a different way of teaching. Because she has never been a mother, she had to find that knowledge on the internet, through books and newspapers, and through training sessions organized by the agency. "The job is easy, but if you don't have love, you won't be able to do it," she said.

According to Ms. Dong, the most difficult thing is still raising children to be good people. Photo: Duc Anh

In Dong's family, the eldest daughter just passed the university entrance exam, and will be entering school in just a few days. The youngest is just over 2 years old. 2 years ago, this childabandoned by motherright in front of the gate of the SOS Children's Village when he was just a few days old. Ms. Dong has taken care of him ever since. Each of Ms. Dong's 9 children has a different family background, most of whom are orphans. "Although some came first, some later, but after a short time, they loved each other like real brothers and sisters, like other families outside", she proudly said.

Dong's mother guides her son how to fold blankets. Photo: Duc Anh

Learning to be a mother

Similar to Ms. Dong, Ms. Phan Thi Thao said that her most difficult job is to raise her children. At this SOS Children's Village, Ms. Thao is the mother with the most children, with 12 children, 4 boys, 8 girls. Among them, there are 3 biological sisters who have only been here for more than 4 months. The 3 children are from Yen Thanh district, unlike the other children in the family, their biological parents are still alive but are not able to raise them. Their biological mother has a serious mental illness and has been in a mental hospital for many years; and their father had an accident and is bedridden.

Since becoming a mother, Thao has been able to celebrate her birthday and receive flowers and gifts from her children. Photo: Duc Anh

Ms. Thao said that, like many other children here, her children did not open up when they first came to the orphanage. Each child hid in a corner, the house was silent. The words mother and child were still awkward. No one said a word during meals, even though Ms. Thao tried to start a conversation. A heavy atmosphere enveloped the small house.

But Ms. Thao persevered and devoted all her love and sincerity to taking care of her children. Feeling that love, her children gradually opened their hearts and told her about their family situation. Therefore, she gradually understood the personality of each child so that she could teach them. Since then, mother and children have become close and loving to each other, and the siblings in the family are also close, harmonious and help each other overcome life's difficulties.

At first, most of the children did not "open up". Ms. Thao had to spend a lot of time sharing with her children. Photo: Duc Anh

Ms. Thao said that since she started working here, every free moment, she goes online or takes out books to study. Her lessons are all about “learning how to be a mother”. In addition, she also has to update her knowledge and stories of young people. In order to be able to confide and share with her school-age children.

Spend your whole life in the orphanage

Not far from these families, in the middle of the children’s village, is a row of small level 4 houses. It is home to 15 retired mothers. After becoming old and weak, each mother is assigned a room to live out the rest of her life in this village.

Mother Vuong is always proud of her 27 children, all of whom are good at chess because she taught them. Her children now have stable lives but still often return to the village to visit their mother. Photo: Duc Anh

Mrs. Ho Thi Nhan (72 years old) is one of them. When we arrived, Mrs. Nhan had just returned from Ho Chi Minh City to take care of her daughter who had just given birth. That daughter was one of 30 children that Mrs. Nhan had raised during the 23 years she had been doing this job. Having retired 5 years ago, her children have now been "born", all of them have stable lives outside. But Mrs. Nhan said that her children still regularly come to visit her.

“Some of the children are now successful and still give me money. I give that money to others who are in more difficult circumstances,” Mrs. Nhan said, pointing to the wall covered with photos and mentioning each child’s name. These are commemorative photos from when her children first came to the village, to the newly hung wedding photos. Despite her old age and declining health, every time her children have an event like giving birth, Mrs. Nhan does not hesitate to take a bus thousands of kilometers to take care of them.

SOS Children's Village Vinh currently takes care of more than 120 children, most of whom are orphans. Photo: Duc Anh

“My children are the same,” said Au Thi Vuong (67 years old) when she heard Nhan talk about her children’s visits. Like Nhan, Vuong started working at SOS Children’s Village Vinh from the very beginning. Both of them have no husband or children outside. That’s why, when they retired, they stayed here. Now, Vuong is still living with her daughter.

“She married a police officer, but her husband’s family is in Ha Tinh. Now she is pregnant, so she is temporarily living with her mother so that she can take care of her,” Mrs. Vuong said, talking endlessly about her children. During more than 20 years of working, Mrs. Vuong has had 27 children. She is always proud of them, because all of them passed the university entrance exam. In particular, all of her children are good at chess; one even won a national gold medal. One year, she had 6 children who all competed in chess. “Even though we are retired, even though our children have gone out and have their own lives, we are still mother and daughter, still caring for and helping each other like other families,” Mrs. Vuong said.

Not only taking care of health, the important task of mothers here is to bring happiness to less fortunate children and educate them to be good people. Photo: Duc Anh

Mr. Le Ba Luong - Director of SOS Children's Village Vinh said that the village is currently raising more than 120 children, most of whom are orphans. There are 15 mothers in total, each mother has about 8 to 12 children. In addition, there are 5 aunts who are ready to replace the mothers whenever needed. In addition, there are 15 retired mothers living in the village.

According to Mr. Luong, when recruited, mothers here must meet the criteria of not being tied down to their own families; must spend all their time at the Village and wholeheartedly care for and raise children; must have the love and instinct of a mother and be trained by the SOS Children's Village to have all the skills to become a real mother, providing the best and longest-lasting physical and mental health care for orphaned, abandoned, and homeless children./.